needs some intense cheering up! :(

what i really, REALLY, hate is letting someone down.

i'm a people-pleaser kinda gal despite the fact that the "norm" would want us to follow want will make us happy regardless of others, i go the extra mile of trying to please everyone at the expense of my own happiness... i'm just that kind of a person.

today, after having been sleep-deprived and worn out due to the one and a half day of "SERIOUS" working in the office and having finished one Starbucks venti cafe mocha (which i ordinarily order in tall or grande!) and one large KrispyKreme hot mocha (which i ordinarily order in medium) without any solid food intake from 6.30am to 6pm (i'm kinda slightly imitating/practicing Ramadan--nope i'm not a Muslim, actually i'm a Catholic but i just want to experience a bit of what they're doing--that's why the deviation from their no-anything-intake from 4am to 6pm)... i've made a crucial decision of going home early (like around 2pm) and hit my much-missed bed for a well-deserved sleep!

but even before i reached my house i saw some missed calls and text messages--in my phone--from work asking for a copy of a draft that is due two days from now. dont get me wrong, i wouldnt leave the office knowing a task is unfinished. i am already done with my two back-to-back-deadlines actually...but only one was typewritten, the other one is written by hand in sheets of paper (which i normally do). i thought i have tomorrow morning to type it down and still be able to turn it in around lunchtime--still a day ahead of deadline. BUT as they called me, i found out that they are asking for the missing draft. I PANICKED! I lied to my friend who accompanied me on my way home, Posh, saying i'm not worried when she asked me if i was worried... but if she knew me well enough she'd know that I AM! i texted my boss (too chicken to make a call!) saying that the paper will be on his table first thing in the morning for his evaluation. BUT he replied and said that the people in Israel (the Israel-counterpart of our office) is asking for the draft. i have no idea that Israel would ask for that one since i just turned in the one due 3days from now.

More panic came my way!
How in the world will i be able to send the draft in written in papers to Israel today???

I replied and suggested a solution to my boss by volunteering to send it via email (since i am already home) , but he declined and said he'll probably do it himself. :(

now i'm sad coz i disappointed him! :(

i hate the feeling of incompetence! :(

i feel that i let him down, which i did... :(

sad... sad... sad...

now, i cant go to sleep knowing someone is disappointed because of me.
now i hate my bed!
how i wish i could turn back time and didnt go home early.
but i cant undo time. darn!

i just want to go back to office...


sad girl in the corner,
prettytwistedchick